It’s almost a week since I saw my mother. If you’ve been following this blog, you’ll know we don’t have a great relationship. From my mother’s point of view, everything is awesome. From my point of view, her narcissistic parenting skills are responsible for over two years of therapy.
Anyhoo, back to the matter in hand. It was with a great deal of trepidation that I set off to see her. We had arranged to meet at the railway station as soon as my train arrived. I sent her the details yet she managed to turn up ten minutes late (she’d been in town all morning) and was not answering her mobile. Eventually, across the crowded concourse, I spotted her. Sneaking up alongside her, I smiled and greeted her. Did she greet me back? No. She launched into a tirade about her phone, how it doesn’t work (it does, I checked) and that it needs to be thrown under the nearest train.
I tried again. “Hi mum. Lovely to see you too.” Eventually she responded. “Oh yes. Hi. Would you look at this phone. It’s useless. It doesn’t even ring.” Taking a deep breath, I switched it from ‘silent’ mode to ‘ring at top volume’ mode!
At this point, I was not feeling hopeful. After all, this is the mother who said her diary was too full to see me until next year, and now I’m here in front of her and her first words were not greetings or hugs. Ah well. My mistake for expecting something different. It looked as though things would play out as they usually do, leaving me feeling messed up inside for the next few days.
However, the rest of the visit passed without a hitch, and I returned home happy to have made the effort to see her. What usually happens afterwards, within a week, is that she will call me to chat about our visit, and then make some very nasty comments about my body shape and weight. She seems to be obsessed with other people’s BMIs.
Yesterday the call occurred and I am amazed to report I was not on the receiving end of her sharp tongue. I’m still reeling from the shock but celebrating none the less. Every positive, no matter how small, is a blessing.
Will it last? Who knows. For now, I’m on top of the world.
Wishing you all a blessed Friday xx
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