Blog Posts, Menopausal Mutterings

Tales from the other side – Does it ever stop?

The changes we undergo in perimenopause… do they stop once we enter the postmenopause zone. This is a hot topic amongst my friends… and Mr D too.

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Here are the top 3 questions asked by my younger friends (and their partners)

Once I’m through the menopause will the night sweats and flushes (flashes for my friends across the pond) stop?

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In my experience they become less ferocious. I still get them, but don’t feel like I could run the central heating on one flush. Imagine how much we could save on our energy bills if we could somehow store the heat generated from our inner power surges! To help deal with these power surges I wear layers and carry a fan. Light layers are easy to remove as a surge hits, and easy to replace when it goes, leaving me with the inevitable chills. The fan comes into play if I’m unable to remove further layers without committing indecency! In addition it gives you a certain air worthy of a Jane Austin novel!

Have I finished changing mentally and physically?

Nope! I think I’ve got a better handle on when I’m succumbing to a bout of health anxiety. You can imagine what’s going though my head today as I have a cold! Everyone keeps asking  if I am sure that’s all I’ve got. Yes I am, thanks for scaring the crap out of me!

Since the start of perimenopause I’ve developed an uncanny knack of catastrophising at the slightest physical change. This hasn’t changed. What has changed is my approach. I use the STOP technique.

  1. Stop what I’m doing – just take a moment to be still
  2. Take a deep breath (or as many as it takes to feel a little less frazzled)
  3. Observer – what is going on inside and outside. Where has my mind wandered to? What am I really feeling?
  4. Proceed – mindfully move on in a more constructive way.

On the positive side of change, I’ve noticed an increased drive for creative projects. Redesigning our master bedroom suite, redesigning a section of our back garden, creating a dry riverbed with a self-contained water feature to name but a few things. Even our kitchen has seen more action that it’s used to. I try at least one new recipe a week. It turns out that my body and nature knew how to do all these things… I simply needed my intellect to catch up!

And finally, what about ‘you know what’ … the bedroom department? Will things still work?

Yes they do. Will you need some help to keep things in tip top condition? You might. It varies from woman to woman. There are a variety of options open to you. In my case I opted for a localized treatment twice weekly prescribed by my doctor. Whatever you choose to use, the doc had one additional piece of advice, ‘use it or lose it!’ The more we practice, the healthier the tissues down there remain. Mind you, I did go to see her fairly soon  after symptoms became an issue. Early intervention is key to successful outcomes. I hope this makes sense as I am trying to keep this post safe for work!

Please feel free to share any other words of wisdom for fellow menopause warriors and their partners in the comments section.

Wishing you all a healthy and happy weekend.

Cath xx (cyber kisses are the safest at the moment!)

1 thought on “Tales from the other side – Does it ever stop?”

  1. A practical post with good information! At 64, my hot flashes are very rare and mild. The changes continue. I told my gynecologist a few years ago that I thought my hormones were messed up because I was having mood swings that felt hormonal, but in retrospect, it was more like catastrophizing, or at least exaggerating the importance of events. She said it was more likely the slow degeneration in my brain and that this is not unusual as we age. Fortunately, it doesn’t happen a lot. Your STOP method is a good one. I’ve seen Stop, Think, Options, Plan, but I like yours better. Thinking can get me in trouble. Taking a deep breath always helps. A sense of humor is good, too. 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

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